4 Things To Consider When Ending The World

Inspired by yesterday's post from Mindy on drinking your own pee (we are a classy bunch here at the League), today I've decided to turn my mind to those unexpected problems we writers can hit when bringing about the apocalypse. Whether you're worrying about keeping a character alive, or you're an evil genius and planning on actually ending the world, be prepared! It pays to think these things through, people....

1. What do you do with all those dead bodies? We're talking disease here, people. So your protagonist is immune to the bug that kills 99.9% of the population? Better come up with a way to make sure all those nasties you can catch from decomposing bodies don't get her.

2. No infrastructure. No toilets, no lights -- everything's a struggle now! This can be fabulous, stakes-raising goodness, but you can also end up with a whole lot of water in plastic bottles in the sun. (And if you have no idea what I'm talking about, check out Mindy's post.) Be prepared, or die of horrible illness!

3. It takes a really long time to walk everywhere. For reals, people. I watched my co-author Meagan Spooner as she worked on her debut SKYLARK, and that girl was google mapping all kinds of hikes to make sure she moved Lark around at the right pace. Which wasn't fast! Also, you're walking the whole time.

4. Caffeine. The internet tells me instant coffee can last up to 20 years (which raises some worrying questions), but with coffee beans, we're talking a couple of years at best. You know that saying 'I'd kill for a cup of coffee'? Well? Everybody else will, too.

So, next time you're thinking of ending the world, think ahead!

2012, Pseudoscience, and Conspiracy Theories

I don’t know why I bothered to stay up the other night to watch 2012. (Oh, yeah. John Cusack.)

With no real explanation—although the world powers have been building arks in the Himalayas for years—the Earth’s core turns to goo and the crust destabilizes.  Amidst the chaos, John Cusack must get his family from LA to China (by way of Yellow Stone National Park) post haste to get on one of those arks. The erupting, crumbling landscape nips at his heals all the way there as the poles shift and land is engulfed by tsunamis.  More monuments and landmarks bite the dust than in Independence Day or War of the Worlds combined.

The movie was engrossing—highly improbable, laughable at times, but still engrossing—but it was purely the special effects that propelled the movie along. Literally. The plot was all about staying ahead of the next cataclysm.  And it was rather obvious who was going to die along the way – mostly because they were sucky human beings.

And this Apocalypse didn’t even happen on 12/21/12.  What’s the point of a movie called 2012 if you’re not going have it happen on that date? (There was mention in the movie that things started happening earlier than the powers that be anticipated. Still.)

For those of you not familiar with this particular Armageddon, according to Mayan prophecy (allegedly), a great cataclysm or some kind of transformation will happen on December 21, 2012.  This is the last date in the 5,125-year-long cycle in the Mayan Long Count calendar. 

I would venture to say most actual Mayan scholars say this is pure crap.  There are no such prophecies, and the end of the calendar doesn’t mean the end of everything. (The ancient Mayan’s had to stop somewhere with their calendar.)

For more on the pseudoscience and general quackery behind the 2012 apocalypse, check out Penn &Teller's take on it: (may contain some offensive language):




Pseudoscience and conspiracy theories can make for good stories. (Notice the can part.)  Dan Brown has made a mint on the Da Vinci Code. Can you guys think of any other good examples?